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Pastoral

Bullied Pastors: two stories…

Two emails from a friend who will remain anonymous…

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I have just read a disturbing article on your website about a couple in the Church of England who were bullied out of the ministry.

Unfortunately I have seen the same thing happen here in Australia in two churches of which my wife and I were members.

In the first one it was a husband and wife team who were shafted by the self-appointed “gatekeepers” of the church. My wife and I were both on the church council and supported the pastor and his wife at all meetings using relevant Scripture to support our arguments. The final damage was done at a council meeting which we were unable to attend, being out of town at the time. Fortunately this couple were taken in by another denomination and found a congregation which fully appreciated their efforts on their behalf. But before the final parting of the ways their life was made miserable by certain people in the church who seemed to think they owned the church.

The second instance occurred despite the best efforts of the pastor to serve the congregation and promote spiritual growth of the members. This pastor was picked on repeatedly by a long standing member who could never be satisfied by anything the pastor did. Again my wife and I supported this pastor and did our best to commend him to other church members. What surprises me is that he did so much and cared so much about the congregation. I suppose one might say that he probably tried too hard. Now that he is no longer in the ministry he no longer enjoys the support of the denomination to which he belongs. It is almost as if he is stigmatised with blame for the disintegration of the churches (there were two congregations) under his care.

The above are broad outlines of what happened and many details and histories could be added.

The article which I referred to and several others like it seem to indicate that pastor abuse is a very serious problem in the church. Indeed if the kind of abuse such pastors suffer took place in a secular situation I have no doubt that successful Workcover claims could be made.

Are there any strategies church members like my wife and I could use to effectively support the pastor in such situations?

I suppose one could say, since we always commit our pastors to God in prayer, that what has happened has been ordained of God who has a bigger picture in view but that in no way addresses the problem of unloving, scheming and manipulative church members exercising powers which must cause the very devil to gloat.

I might add that I still keep in touch with the second pastor who, though discouraged, is still able to rely on the Father and trust Him for whatever outcomes.

So one might say, “See, God is bringing something good out of this man’s suffering.” (And I am certain that is true.) We could just as easily add, “Insallah.”

I am not sure I have fulfilled my purpose in writing to you. Maybe I am just letting off steam.

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In my experience pastors are no different from the congregations they minister to. They vary in their gifts and abilities the same as all of us. They are no less sinners than we are and saved by the same grace of God we all are. It is a sad fact of life that many people have unreal expectations of their pastors. Instead of coming alongside to support their ministry by adding their own ministry they set up in competition or they set the pastor on a pedestal and when they find he doesn’t measure up to their unreal expectation he is persecuted without mercy. In the second instance, quoted above, our church had no pastor for a time and I guess I was it in a de facto way and certainly not able to do it as well as someone trained for the job. Besides I had a full time position as a school teacher. A church in a neighbouring town had a half time pastor (which was all they could afford to pay) who had been a member of our church. I was greatly relieved when our church called this man to be half time pastor in our church.

The problem was, as I see it now, is that there is no such thing as part time pastor. Both churches expected him to be their full time pastor, though nobody actually expressed this in so many words. He was attempting a juggling act while walking a tightrope between the two very different (though “Baptist”) churches. At the beginning of the sharing of the pastor at a joint meeting of the leaders of of the two churches I unsuccessfully proposed an amalgamation. It seemed like a good idea at the time but neither church wanted to consider it.

I suppose pastors can also set up unrealistic expectations for themselves and consequently work themselves into the ground. Where are they taught they must be omni-competent? Surely if the body of Christ in a certain location is healthy all the members are working in unison using their various gifts, in which case maybe the pastor does not have to preach a great sermon each week. Perhaps another member of the congregation is gifted that way. The pastor of the church we are now attending, while an excellent preacher recognises others in the congregation may have the gift and is training some of them in expository preaching. He is allowing other members to preach, not only in his absence, and this is to the benefit of all concerned. So he is growing into a coach of a well motivated team and the church is growing both spiritually and numerically.

OK, I’ll get off my soapbox.

October 2006

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